Fishing

by Kate Winslet Barba

 One click, one flash of a camera light and all memories reminisce.

“Jack, I want you to be a famous photographer, go fishing.”  A last word that my mentor uttered before he passed away. 

Until now, I still can’t get what it mean. Fishing? Am I a fisher man?  But I’m not. I want to be a famous photographer to be proud of by my mentor who treated me as his own. 

In one place where people come and go just to pray, to listen and to learn, this is where I am now. I saw a lot of vendors outside, young street urchins and a lot people with their family. While waiting to the mass will soon to start, I decided to take some pictures, a life of a photographer. 

*click* “mmmm… good shot!” I said unconsciously. It’s very familiar scenario to me but I don’t know when and why will it happen. A young street urchin who eats siopao that she beg for alms. She seems very hungry. 

*click* *click* *click* “Ugh... My head start aching again.” 

“tutoy… why are you still there? The sun will soon set down. You don’t look ok. Here!” said a man who’s carrying camera and gave me some piece of turon. 

“Thank you sir for saving me from hunger. I have my name sir, Harry. Is there a problem staying here outside the cathedral? Isn’t it my home? This is my house. ” said the child innocently. 

“Ugh… what’s that memory? I can’t get it. Maybe it’s just my old dream.” And the bell rang. I started to walk inside but my head is continuously aching.

“Your house? Why are you alone.”

“Yes. I am waiting for miracle to happen that someday, I will be a normal child with loving parents”

*click*

“Are you having fun taking pictures of mine? Having a huge head with a lot of water that can be an aquarium? Haha just kidding. But anyway, thank you again sir!” And the young street urchin started to walk away. But suddenly, Harry fell down together with the loud sound of the bell rang.

“Harry! Harry! Harryyyyyy!” the last voice that harry heard until he lost his consciousness. 

*ting* *ting* *ting* the bell rang noisily. 

“Ugh… what is it again? Harry? Who is he? Weird.” 

I started to walk inside the chapel, wondering what will be the message of the mass and taking pictures to the people who entering without their knowing. Stolen shots. I am doing panning and sometimes motion blur. Those are the things that my mentor taught me. Panning is one of my favorite in experimenting slower shutter speeds where keeping the object or people your following sharp while blurring the background. I learned many things from him but I still can’t get the point of fishing in photography. He left me question in my mind that until now, I don’t know the answer. 

The choir starts to sing. My heart also start to beat so fast. I don’t know why. Is it because it’s my first time again after the long decade without entering a chapel? I am a sinner indeed, a big shame for me.

“Papa” said a child dolefully. 

 “Harry, just be here, this is the house of God, then this is our house too. We’re not rich to get a Vp shunt for your hydrocephalus so just pray for miracle for your healing. I will be back.” the father said irritably. 

While the choir is singing, the child just stared at his father leaving. 

My tears fell down, seeing a father carrying his son in his shoulder. But why I am seeing different things. 

*click* “excellent shot!” I said unconsciously. 

Do you know what the best in photography? Stopping the time. Why? Because when you captured, we stop the time in a moment that can be treasured for a long time. 

The choir member started to stare at me individually, even the old servants in the chapel. It’s really weird. But I didn’t took it seriously. Maybe I am not that tall as a guy? Or maybe, I took some pictures to the surroundings or maybe because, I have a scar in my head and they pity me that’s why they are staring at me. 

“Am I too cute? Or did they know me? This afternoon, a lot of weird things happen.” I whisper to myself. 

The priest in front start the sermons and ended it smoothly. 

“You look so familiar. Did we met before?” said the old servant in this cathedral

“No, we’re not. I am from Manila and this is my first time here in this province.”

I went here in province of Mindoro Occidental just to answer the question that my mentor left me. He said that I will find it here in this cathedral. But isn’t it weird? That I am seeing things here that I didn’t saw before? A memory of a child who’s crying, dying in hunger but still can manage to joke around, a child with a huge head and a child waiting for miracle to happen. As a photographer, you must not ignore those kinds of memories to shot. 

One click, one flash of a camera light. 

“Ugh... Ouch!” I was dazzled by the flash of a camera light of someone and fell down the earth while seeing the sunset outside the chapel.

“Jack?!” says the best friend of my mentor after he took shot of mine

.

“Harry! Harry! Harryyyyy!” I heard my mentor’s voice. And the bell rang 

“Ahhhhhhh! My head!” 

“ Har… Jack?! Are you ok?”

“Har…? Harry? Who’s harry? Uncle, answer me. I am Jack right? But Am I Harry also? Is it possible? Why that name keeps repeating in my mind?”

“Har…. Jack…” my uncle just whisper “sorry…” 

“I get it. I already know the answer.”

“I am right. That’s why you look so familiar.” said the old servant of this chapel.

I see. I am the fish here and my mentor is my fisher man who gave bait for me to know the truth. As like what priest says lately, “the value of one”, the value of remembering and looking back where you start.  And that will be your inspiration in doing your dreams.

I may not have good parents who will accept me in the past out of poverty, but God gave me a mentor who cherish me and gave me a dream to fulfill in the future. The value of alms to the street urchins who’s needing it, the value of a child’s life who’s innocent in this world, the value of having capturing things that we’ll never turn back. Maybe this is what my mentor meant, waiting for the moment to happen and capture like waiting hours for one fish to bite. 

One click, one flash of a camera light and all things put in its original place.